AM I A TALEBEARER? (Part III)

Talebearing is one sign of a backslidden life. In their wayward state, gossipers get into the habit of hitting out at others behind their backs, or passing on the secrets of others. Gossips may also be motivated by bitterness and a desire to retaliate against an offensive party. What are the other possible causes?
 

Sinful inclination

It is in our evil nature to desire to know about things which are none of our concern. The apostle Paul warns Timothy against such idle gossipers : “And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not” (I Tim. 5:13). How much a person is paid is none of our business. Whether someone is getting married earlier or later does not concern us. Let us, therefore, not be busybodies in other men’s matters. And if someone is in trouble, let us not try to put the person through an interrogation process. Love does not probe for details; love helps out. My brother does not need to tell every single detail so that we can pray for him. We should pray much rather than probe and pry.
 

Self-exaltation

Gossips are proud, self-appointed judges of others. It is in our corrupt nature to feel good when we hear of others’ faults and failings. By tearing down others, self-righteous people exalt themselves. The proud Pharisee who went into the Temple to pray manifested the marks of a gossip. He prayed within himself, despising the “wretched” publican who stood nearby. “I thank Thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican” (Lk. 18: 11).

Self-righteous people have forgotten that they have a nature just as sinful as the person they disdain. The Lord Jesus, on many occasions, sharply rebuked the scribes and Pharisees for their self-righteous spirit. Before we condemn them, let us look within our own hearts. Are we not much like the Pharisees when we disparage others while ignoring our own nature which is as corrupt as those we despise? Do we not need as much grace as those whom we condemn? May God help us to consider our ways and humble ourselves before Him.
 

Satan’s tool

The Devil is always on the look-out for disgruntled and vulnerable people whom he may use to mount a ‘moral’ crusade against others. Satan is the father of malicious lies and gossip. In his dealings with Adam and Eve, he misrepresented the character of God by subtly distorting the truth. He implied that God was tyrannical and unfair toward them:

“And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil” (Gen. 3: 4-5). Since that first lie, Satan has continued to make use of willing lips to promote lies, spread rumours, plant doubt and taint the character of others. May we never be a ready tool of Satan. Watch out lest we be used by him to mar someone’s name and stir up negative feelings against the victim .
 

An unregenerate heart?

When one is born again, there must be marks of regeneration, one of which is the bridled tongue. How true it is that he who looks after his heart – his spiritual health – will look after his lips! If the heart is right, the speech will be right also. “For a good tree bringeth not forth corrupt fruit; neither doth a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. For every tree is known by his own fruit. For of thorns men do not gather figs, nor of a bramble bush gather they grapes. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh” (Lk. 6: 43-45). “If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man’s religion is vain” (Jas 1: 26). If we continue to indulge a slanderous spirit, we have deceived ourselves and made void our profession of faith!
 

Conclusion

Brethren, let us deal with this wicked sin. Our words reflect our spiritual state; corrupt speech is a mark of an unconverted heart. Pray for God’s grace to speak rightly. Like the psalmist, let us pray: “Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in Thy sight, O LORD, my Strength, and my Redeemer” (Ps. 19: 14). May we set a watch over our lips: “Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips” (Ps 141: 3). Let us put away from us “a froward mouth, and perverse lips” (Prov. 4: 24).

“It is dangerous to speak, where secrecy is required. The thought is thine own, while you keep it to yourself; but once the cage is opened, and the bird let loose, who knows how far its flight may bear it? At first you think of tying it by the foot. You tell your secret to a single friend. He tells it to another, who mentions it to a chosen few. The cord is loosened; then it is slipped; your bird will no more roost in secrecy. Then learn to keep your secret to yourself. It is snug to know the bird is in the cage, securely fastened. And though it flutters against the bars, desiring its liberty, still keep it close. No harm it will do while there. What mischief it might do if let loose, you know not. If you think evil of a man, what need to mention it? His faults are known to thee. But why repeat them? Who has a right to ask it? God suffered thee to know these, that thou mightest pray for him, and not to harm him and others by spreading his dishonour. Pray for him, if you will, the more the better. Think what God’s grace may do for him. Such thoughts are safe. But if you harbour thoughts against the man, and not against the sin, most probably the thought will out, and injure you” – quoted by Charles Bridges in his commentary on Ecclesiastes.

- Pastor